Archives for posts with tag: Humor

Denver Broncos at Cleveland Browns

Sunday October 18, 2015

Regular Season Game #6

Rule                                                                                          Penalty

  1. Dwayne Bowe plays                                                        1 Drink
  2. Dwayne Bowe does anything positive          Go Home You’re Drunk
  3. Show Johnny Manziel                                                      1 Drink
  4. Show Colleen Crowley                                                     1 Drink
  5. Colleen Crowley Posts Selfie During Game                    2 Drinks
  6. Colleen Crowley Posts Selfie from Texas                        3 Drinks
  7. Colleen Crowley Posts Selfie with Manziel’s Wallet        5 Drinks
  8. Show Paul Kruger with Johnny Manziel                         10 Drinks
  9. Twitter says Johnny Manziel should be starting               Social
  10. Justin Gilbert gets burned                                                 Social
  11. Justin Gilbert plays WR                                                     1 Drink
  12. Justin Gilbert burns someone else                                    1 Drink
  13. TJ Ward shown                                                                 1 Drink
  14. TJ Ward Interception                                                         1 Drink
  15. TJ Ward Touchdown                                                         6 Drinks
  16. Jordan Norwood Catch                                                      1 Drink
  17. Jordan Norwood TD                                                          6 Drinks
  18. Mention Peyton Hillis- the ‘Albino Rhino’/ Quinn Trade      1 Drink
  19. Jimmy Haslam seen making out with Peyton Manning    Finish Beer
  20. Mention The Drive                                                           Finish Beer
  21. Mention The Fumble                                                       Finish Beer
  22. Show John Elway                                                            Finish Beer
  23. Any Mention of Cleveland Past Failures.                         SOCIAL
  24. BROWNS WIN!                                                                SOCIAL!!

*Most of you know how this goes. It is for entertainment purposes only and any and all suggestions of actual drinking are purely incidental.

smooth-jimmy-apollo2

Week_4

Oakland Raiders at Cleveland Browns

Sunday September 27, 2015

Regular Season Game #3

Rule                                                                                          Penalty

  1. Twitter complains about Josh McCown                             1 Drink
  2. McCown dives headfirst on a play                                    6 Drinks
  3. McCown throws Touchdown                                             10 Drinks
  4. McCown 300 yards passing                                            10 Drinks
  5. Mention Terrelle Pryor                                                      1 Drink
  6. Mention Johnny Manziel                                                   1 Drink
  7. Show Johnny Manziel                                                    10 Drinks
  8. Twitter says Johnny Manziel should be starting                Social
  9. Justin Gilbert shown on bike on sideline                           Social
  10. Mention ‘Red Right 88’                                                        1 Drink
  11. Show ‘Red Right’ 88                                                    Finish Beer
  12. Charles Woodson tells someone to ‘get off his lawn’          Social
  13. Charles Woodson accidentally wears leather helmet        1 Drink
  14. Backup Matt McLovin’ comes in at QB for Raiders            Social
  15. Sebastian Janikowski kicks                                                Social
  16. Sebastian Janikowski seen drinking with Johnny Manziel   Shot
  17. Chris Simms refererred  to as ‘Phil’                                     Shot
  18. Browns surpass their own record XP attempt                Finish Beer
  19. Any Mention of Cleveland Past Failures.                            SOCIAL
  20. BROWNS WIN!                                                                  SOCIAL!!

*Most of you know how this goes. It is for entertainment purposes only and any and all suggestions of actual drinking are purely incidental.

#Browns

Buffalo Bills at Cleveland Browns

Thursday August 20, 2015

Preseason Game #2

Rule                                                                                    Penalty
  1. Mention Rex Ryan                                                    1 Drink
  2. Mention Rex Ryan’s Weight                                     6 Drinks
  3. Mention Rex Ryan’s Foot Fetish                            10 Drinks
  4. Mention “Johnny Football”                                        1 Drink
  5. Mention Manziel Rehab                                            6 Drinks
  6. Show Connor Shaw                                                  1 Drink
  7. Speculate on Connor Shaw’s Future                         6 Drinks
  8. Justin Gilbert gets Burned                                            Social
  9. Justin Gilbert Gets Burned for Touchdown                 1 Shot
  10. CLE Defense gives up 5+ yard Run                           1 Drink
  11. CLE Defense gives up Rushing TD                              Social
  12. TD Browns                                                                    Social
  13. 2 Pt. Extra Point Attempt                                           2 Drinks
  14. Mention that ‘It’s only preseason”                              3 Drinks
  15. Mention of IK Enemkpali, face puncher                     2 Drinks
  16. IK Enemkpali Turnover Recovery                                Social
  17. Geno Smith Mention                                                  1 Drink
  18. Deflategate mention                                                   1 Drink
  19. Any Mention of Browns new uniforms                        2 Drinks
  20. Any Mention of Cleveland Past Failures.                     SOCIAL
  21. BROWNS WIN!                                                         SOCIAL!!

*Most of you know how this goes. It is for entertainment purposes only and any and all suggestions of actual drinking are purely incidental.

#Browns

The news came down yesterday that longterm commissioner of the NBA, David Stern, is stepping down on Feb. 1, 2014, giving him 30 years of service in that role. With that in mind, here is a candid look at some of his greatest achievements.

10. Kept the lockouts under 5 in his term.

9. Left us with something called the WNBA.

8. Tried to introduce the public school gym class plastic basketball for part of a season (until Mark Cuban stepped in).

7. Got Allen Iverson to wear a tie.

6. Advancements in science such as the frozen envelope.

5. Forced Michael Jordan to play our national pastime.

4. Changed the NBA’s philanthropic slogan from “The NBA don’t give a shit,” to “The NBA Cares.”

3. Oversaw the placement of an NBA team in war-torn Canada.

2. Introduced a drug testing program that still allowed Portland to field a team.

1. Outspoken proponent of MMA, even once hosting the “Malice in the Palace” featuring the Indiana Pacers fighting the Detroit Pistons.